In a move no one saw coming (or possibly everyone, given Hollywood’s current trajectory), MGM has officially announced that Pedro Pascal will take on the iconic role of Lara Croft in the upcoming Tomb Raider live-action reboot.

The decision has left fans in a state of utter bewilderment, with some praising Pascal’s undeniable charisma and others wondering if Hollywood executives are just spinning a wheel at this point.

“We wanted to bring something fresh to the franchise,” said director Chloe Zhao in an exclusive interview. “And what’s fresher than completely ignoring any previous characterization of Lara Croft and just giving the role to Pedro Pascal?”

A Bold New Take on the Iconic Tomb Raider

Pascal, known for his roles as a rugged father figure in The Last of Us, The Mandalorian, and basically every major TV show in the last five years, has fully embraced his new role.

“When they called me and said, ‘Pedro, we want you to be Lara Croft,’ I thought it was a joke,” Pascal admitted in a press release. “Then they backed up a truck full of money, and I said, ‘Okay, sure, let’s raid some tombs.’”

The first teaser image of Pascal in full Croft attire—complete with the signature dual pistols, tank top, and short shorts—was met with mixed reactions. While some praised his commitment to the look, others noted that his “adventuring dad” energy might not quite match Lara’s classic portrayal.

“I just hope he keeps the accent,” one fan tweeted. “I want to hear Pedro Pascal dramatically whisper ‘I hate tombs’ in full Chilean-British fusion.”

The Film Will Be “The First of its Kind”

Adding to the growing list of bizarre production choices, MGM has also confirmed that the entire film will be released in stunning 4K resolution—at a breathtaking 15 frames per second.

“We felt that a lower frame rate really enhances the cinematic experience,” said Zhao. “It makes it feel more like an early PlayStation cutscene, which is the true essence of Tomb Raider.”

Early test screenings have reportedly left audiences feeling “mildly seasick” due to the game-like stutter effect, but the studio remains confident that fans will “eventually get used to it.”

A Future Classic, Or Hollywood’s Weirdest Casting Yet?

Despite the backlash, some fans are cautiously optimistic.

“I mean, I was mad about the Mario movie at first, and that turned out fine,” one Reddit user admitted. “Maybe Pedro Pascal in short shorts is exactly what this franchise needs.”

Meanwhile, MGM is already teasing a potential sequel, with rumors swirling that Chris Pratt is in talks to play Lara’s new sidekick, Janet.

The Tomb Raider reboot is set to hit theaters in Summer 2026, assuming audiences can handle watching Pascal parkour at 15 FPS without throwing up. Women might want to leave their cucumbers at home for this one.